Author of Dating & Waiting
By: Trisha Bleau Smith
T4JYM: Dating & Waiting was such an amazing and powerful book. I wish I had a book like this when I was single. Where did the idea for the book come from?
BR: Thank you for your kind words. It is gratifying to know that you found the book helpful in some way.
My motivation for writing this book came from two sources. One was my own struggle as a single Christian to understand what God was trying to teach me through the experiences – some painful, some joyful, some just plain confusing – of that stage of life. The other motivation stemmed from being a leader in a Bible study of mostly twenty-something singles and needing to think through how to address some of the unique issues that arose in such a group.
My experience was that most of what had been written on singleness and dating did not really attempt to address the issues from an explicitly and intentionally biblical perspective. So I set out to try to assemble some of that material and eventually it grew into this book.
T4JYM: How much editing was involved? Did you do it all alone or did you send it to people to edit? How many times did you have to re-edit your works?
BR: I wrote one entire draft of the book before I let anyone else read any of it. Then I asked several friends – some who were peers, others who were older-and-wiser Christians – to read it over and provide feedback. Based on their comments and my own further thought, I revised the draft extensively before starting to look for a publisher.
T4JYM: How many publishers did you send your book to before it was picked up? Was it rejected by any publishers?
BR: I don’t remember the exact number, but I sent the manuscript to several (perhaps a dozen?) publishers. All of them rejected it (including one well-known Christian publisher who deemed it “too biblical”!) until it came to the attention of Dennis Hillman at Kregel Publications, who liked it and wanted to publish it. Ironically, after all those rejections, two other publishers besides Kregel became interested in it at about the same time.
T4JYM: Who have been your biggest influences in life? Who have been your biggest influences in your life as a writer?
BR: Wow, that’s a tough question because I’m at an age now where I can look back and see that there have been many, even though I might not have understood or appreciated how significant their influence was at the time I was receiving it. My family has been a major influence, particularly my sister Sharon and her husband who have been “spiritual parents” to me in many ways. There have been many Christian brothers and sisters over the years who have come along side me at various stages of my life and influenced me. One of the most profound influences has been Peninsula Bible Church in Palo Alto, CA where I have enjoyed fellowship and have been taught the Word for the past twenty years (and where I occasionally have a chance to teach). I have also been influenced strongly by chances I have had to study at Regent College in Vancouver, B.C., particularly through classes taught by Dr. Bruce Waltke.
As a writer, I think I have been influenced by men and women whose writing I enjoy – people like John Stott, Ray Stedman, J. I. Packer, Elisabeth Elliot, R. C. Sproul, C. H. Spurgeon, N.T. Wright, Alister McGrath, C. S. Lewis.
T4JYM: negative feedback?
BR: Generally, the reviews have been pretty positive. I think that many people have found the explicitly biblical basis of the book helpful. I don’t claim to have all the answers and I don’t have a particular agenda or dating philosophy to advance – my concern is to uncover the biblical foundations by which we can understand how God would have us live life as single men and women, and I think many readers have found that perspective refreshing. A friend who is a pastor to single adults said that unlike many dating/singles book he had read, this one was different because it was “not formulaic.”
On the negative side – somewhat to my surprise – a few readers have found this very feature to be a detriment. One reviewer thought the book was “too theoretical and too theological.”
T4JYM: What are your next plans for writing? Do you plan to do any more books along the same lines as this book? Will you move on to new writing?
BR: I do hope to do more writing. I am doing some research on a couple of topics that I hope may someday yield enough material for a book.
T4JYM: What is generally your target audience? Do you write specifically to ministry workers or have you written other books targeted at other audiences? How do you decide on what audience to focus your writing on?
BR: In “Dating and Waiting” the target audience really was any single Christian with “ears to hear,” although I was especially concerned with the “mid-twenties-to-early-thirties” age group because of my own experiences.
T4JYM: Have you written any other books? Do you have any ideas for books you would like to write?
BR: I have written one other book, but it concerns technology rather than theology. I do have a couple of ideas I am developing for books with a biblical focus, but they are still at pretty early stages.
T4JYM: How do you find time to write? Life is busy and time management is hard to do sometimes. When do you do your best writing and where?
BR: It really is hard to find time to write, especially since developing a book usually requires a sustained effort over a long period. I started writing “Dating and Waiting” when I was single, and by the time it was published I already had one child with another on the way! And it is certainly true that marriage and parenting drastically decrease the amount of time available for other activities, such as writing.
Somebody once said that “writing is thinking and re-writing is writing,” which I take to mean that composition is really a two-step process: working out the ideas in your head and recording them initially, then polishing and massaging their written expression so that it communicates clearly and memorably to a reader. Some writers are so skillful that they can go pretty directly from what is in their heads to a final version on paper and be done with it. As a reader, I enjoy writing that is both clear and elegant; thus, I usually spend of lot of time re-writing, trying to achieve some degree of clarity and elegance (with varying degrees of success).
T4JYM: What training do you have in writing? Did you take any writing courses in college to obtain the skills you have currently?
BR: I have not had any unusual training in writing. When I was in school, I took (what were back then anyway) the typical courses in writing. One of my interests is in classical languages (such as Latin, Greek, and Hebrew) and I have found that learning the grammar of another language really does help you write better in English. I was educated at a time when they still taught sentence diagramming, and I have found that training valuable not only for writing but also for Bible study. I have also done a lot of technical writing in the course of my professional career, and learning how to present a clear explanation of a scientific concept is good practice for writing in other fields.
T4JYM: What advice would you give to someone who wants to pursue a career in writing?
BR: (see below)
T4JYM: What advice would you give to someone interested in publishing their works?
BR: Write as much as you possibly can – practice makes perfect.
Read as much as you possibly can. Extensive readers tend to be better writers.
Find people you trust who will give you honest feedback on your writing.
Be prepared to have your work rejected many times before it is published; learn not to take it personally or let it devastate you.
Pray about what you are doing; surrender to your Lord whatever expectations you have about your writing.
Christian writing conferences can be a valuable experience. They can offer very valuable advice on writing and on how to get your work published. Good conferences will offer manuscript critiquing services that can be very helpful and will give you an opportunity to talk with representatives of publishing companies. (For example, the Mount Hermon Christian Writers’ Conference, held every year in Northern California, is a great one).
Be the first to comment